On Time
I've spent – possibly even wasted – so much of my life pondering time itself. This has been true since the moment I became cognizant of it. I remember as a toddler I had spent one morning watching The Smurfs, then later while eating breakfast, it occurred to me that while I was eating now, it felt just as much like now when I had been watching TV some moments prior. I've been obsessively pondering time ever since.
Despite this obsession, which has done little throughout my life but inspire despair, I have done badly in properly using my time and applying it to my goals. I wish I had come upon these realizations as a younger man at 16 instead of at 30. Nometheless, it is good I am cognizant of this now, as I can better take advantage of my (likely) remaining 40-some years.
I have made so much positive change over the past few years; this isn't to be discounted. However, I lament my not having realized all this earlier.
Oh well. Dwelling on this would be a bad use of my time.
Memento mori.